It's 3am...

And I just got home. Finals weeks mean many things on campus. For people in my job it means midnight breakfasts, and manning the all night study locations.

A 1-3am shift makes for an awkward time to go back to sleep to wake in a few hours.

While I'm up though I thought I would share a story from last night's midnight breakfast. I was serving french toast sticks to hungry, sleep-deprived students (many of whom had probably FINALLY cracked that book open for the first time this semester) and I realized I was talking to them like I do to Koda. With Koda, I find a mumble, a half-nod, a grunt an unnacceptable way to say yes. Well, many of our 18-21 years olds on campus seem to still be doing this.

Me: French toast sticks *wearing my cheesy grin
Student: mmmmph
Me: Yes? Or No? *in a motherly-clearly ennunciate-tone
Student: Yes
Me: Great!

Replace student with Koda in the above dialogue and that is the average morning in our household.

Peanut-free for me

A few months ago now Tristen had a head to toe reaction while eating eggs. Fortunately, Benedryl stopped the reaction, and off we were to the doctore who actually did not think it was the eggs but a cross contamination reaction to peanuts. We got our allergist referral, and have been avoiding peanuts just in case.

By avoiding, we certainly were not over the top. We still have PB in the house. Travis still ate peanuts. Tristen still ate from the bakery section of the grocery.

Today, Tristen finally had his allergist appointment. They had to end the test early because his reaction was severe. So, Travis came home with perscription for an Epi Pen to find a freaked out momma who threw out/donated every jar of PB, and started reading every label. Our generic cherrios? Definitely made in a facility that has peanuts. Travis's argument is that the cheerios haven't given him a reaction yet and he has had them for nearly a year. My reaction? Do you really want to risk it?

So, my momma bear protective nature is trying to balance letting my child be a child and wanting to bleach every surface he will ever touch. Travis doesn't want our little guy to live in a bubble, I don't want to stab my child in the leg with an Epi Pen.

I remember hearing schools going entirely peanut free and debating with myself if that was overboard. Now, I can't imaging sending my child to school where 90% of kids are eating PB, have PB oil on their hands, place those hands on toys... you get my point.

I'm sure we'll find the balance between bubble and living. It will take time, we did only learn for sure a few hours ago. Yet, I can't help but mourn that Tristen will be the kid at birthday parties that has to ask the host what is in the cake before he can enjoy it too. Seems like such an unfair loss of innocence.

Winter Wonderland

Today we took a short trip over to the campus preschool to use their playground...in a snowstorm. It was fun, cold, and wore the boys out. A perfect morning. Note: the pics are messed up, but if you click on them you can see the full image. Not sure what happened there.

So much to be thankful for

Every year I feel I have so much more to be thankful for. While we do not say grace before meals in our family, Travis and I have been saying our "I'm thankful fors" for the past few years before our meal.

I'm not even sure I could limit it. I am so incredibly thankful for a stable job that I really enjoy, wonderful coworkers who challenge me to be better and more humble, a roof over our heads, an amazingly supportive husband who loves me (even if he is about as romantic as mud), and children who everyday amaze me. I look at them all the time and can't believe they are mine.

Times may be stressful and a struggle, but what a blessed year it has been.

Death and Taxes

They say the only sure things in life are death and taxes. Well. I've got another one. With two kids...freaking laundry...a lot of it!

Anyone want to come help fold ten loads? I'll pay you with the homemade applesauce I made today. Ignore the way-to-much water. I'm not quite in touch with my domestic diva yet. I doubled the recipe witout accounting that I should not have doubled the water too since I cooked it in the crockpot. My bad.

But really, who wants to come match socks :)

Emergency Kit Goof Up

I used to be Coordinator of Campus Safety in my last job. Even before that position, I was always a worse case scenario gal. Maybe I watched too many end of the world made for TV movies with my mom growing up (luv you mom ;) ). Given all of that, I've always belived in having: an emergency kit ready to go, and a fully stocked pantry.

Travis is more than supportive, and if anything, would love to have a doubly fully stocked pantry. It gives him piece of mind. A few nights ago, I got to thinking of our emergency kit. I hadn't really gone through it since moving, and I could guiltily count the times I had gone in to grab something "to be quickly replaced" that never was. The waterproof matches used to light birthday cakes, the batteries used for dead remotes and kid toys, the bandaids long since used over the fun summer. With new resolve, I decided to update ours.

After ten minutes of cussing, I finally had to interupt Travis to ask where the heck our emergency kit was (Fail #1). It apparently had been moved into a closet, under a bag of old clothes, tucked behind a suitcase. Where any emergency kit should be, right?

Now, here I justify that our emergency kit used to be a large tupperware bin. In moving to Maine, I had temporarily downgraded it to a much smaller container because I needed to larger bin in the move (Fail #2). I never got it back in shape.

Upon going through it I found: One large battery that goes to a lantern. Lantern no where to be found (Fail 3), some square batteries- that go to nothing (Fail 4). I did have a first aid kit (but no ready ice pack- used when Koda fell once- or thermometer- used when Tristen got sick and couldn't find ours- or scissors- who knows where those went), the plastic sheeting Homeland Security ordered every kit to have in the days immididately post 9/11 (yet no duct tape, hammer, nails, etc to do anything with it...so maybe a fancy see-through blanket?). How many fails am I up to? Basically, all said and done, I had supplies for, um, nothing.

Looking at our pantry, we always keep a stock of fruits and veggies, and pasta. That said, we've definately depleted our stock in recent months and have 0 bottled water.

So, my news years challenge will be getting up to date on our emergency preparedness. Would you believe I don't even have my families phone numbers actually written anywhere? They are in my cell phone. Thank goodness I don't teach others about safety now, I'm failing hard here! We'll get back up to speed just in time for the bird flu, attack, depression, or whatever calamity the latest talking head is spewing today.

Sunday Koda-isms

Upon arriving at Walmart today, Koda began reciting the store rules to Tristen that we normally tell Koda.

"No running, no screaming, no crying, when say stop- STOP!" and upon finding Tristen giggling at him, he added a new store rule "and no laughing, no funny!" Serious trip to Wal mart it is.

As Travis was bringing the dog out this evening Koda called out to him "Daddy walk the dog real quick, daddy watch out for dinosaurs!". Those silly dinosaurs get us every time.

Happy Sunday!

Some days it is worth a broken dish or two

It is 5:30pm, do you know where your sons are? Mine are wrestling, screaming, yelling, and otherwise pushing me over the edge. After a pretty nasty match over a stupid little blue ball, I had a momentary inspiration. I went into the bedroom where we store Christmas presents that we pick up throughout the year. I pull out a beach ball that was going to be a stocking stuffer.

Momentary cooperative play.

When it gets dark by 4, and by boys have unbelievable pent up energy, momentary is golden.

Crap, the moment has passed. They're screaming again.

Overdue pictures

Some long overdue pictures... I decided to get all fancy on you :)

Santa here yet?

Koda has discovered the "magic" of Santa. Sure, he humored us last year while we made cookies from scratch that happened to closely resemble Travis' favorite cookies, but he didn't "get" it. As I was flipping through the Sunday paper looking for the coupon pages, a ToysRus ad fell out. Koda was enthralled. He flipped through it for a good long while. Then, he went where last Sunday's paper was and looked for another. Well, last week Target put out their giant "toy" catalog. This is now Koda's favorite book.

He took the "book" to nap. He took it in the car. He asks to read his book non-stop. He also announces to anyone who will humor him that he wants to go to the Giraffe Store (AKA ToysRus). Travis and I explained to him that he couldn't have the toy truck or train he wanted so badly. Christmas wasn't here yet. We explained how the elves are stil busy building toys and we have to wait until Christmas for Santa to come.

After nap time, Koda sat next to me, again flipping through his new favorite book and asked "Christmas yet?". No Koda, not quite. We watched Rudolph which he stared at with his mouth open. He excitedly pointed to Santa and the elves. After dinner he turned and asked "Santa here yet?". No Koda, not yet. This morning after running in the living room to see if Little Einsteins was playing he looked around and asked "Santa coming?". Yes Koda, he is coming. But let's celebrate Thanksgiving first (darn you mall with your ready made Santa Vilage who isn't helping my cause here).

Today, we will be writing to Santa, and apparently, coloring him a picture according to Koda. But not until after nap, and not until I hear the now routine post-nap "Santa here yet?". And as much as I pretend to be annoyed with the constant questioning, I'm being reintroduced to the magic of this season through the eyes of my three year old.

Bread Check...Kids? Um?

I don't go to work until 1pm on Thursdays. When I set up that schedule I had images of getting all sorts of things done in the mornings. Never happens.

Today, I did manage to get to the grocery store. After hurrying through and grabbing stuff for lunch, we checked out and I got the kids in the car. I was backing out when I saw an old lady looking very oddly at me. I simultaneously realized I was about to hit the cart I just used. Only then did I notice, the cart FULL of groceries that I had nearly left in the store parking lot.

At least I remembered the kids.

Daylight Savings Hell

Daylight Savings sounds like such a good thing right? Surely something called "savings" must be beneficial.

It stinks. Nope, I can't even put a positive spin on it. The kids wake up by 5:30-6, it is already dark outside and I still have half an hour of work, and everyone is grumpy. Well, I'm grumpy. And that is making everyone grumpy.

I always struggle with the time change, but this year seems even worse. It might be due to the unseasonably gorgeous fall we had that allowed me to be in winter-denial just a few more weeks. Today, I needed mittens. And apaprently, if I walk the dog, I will need a flashlight less I risk stepping in poop.

On a good note, this means the holidays are drawing closer. Turkey was on sale for .48 a pound this week. Crazy. I can't wait to put up the tree if for no other reason than to offer a little more light on these dreary Maine afternoon/nights.

Tomorrow I will aim for a more upbeat posting :) Did I mention we have been pretty much done Christmas shopping since Aug/Sept?

Looking back two years ago

(Let me first say this is NOT an announcement, thank you very much)

Exactly two years ago I sat Travis down and told him I had made a video for our families for Christmas. Two years later, how our lives have changed and I am so thankful and blessed.

What A Journey It Has Been...

We got it right!

Election Night is like Christmas morning for me. Or maybe the SuperBowl. Maybe even both all rolled into one.

I tally results and post them in the residence hall lobby for the students to see who are busily running to check mail and aren't as interested in following the state by state result, just want to know when they call it.

After spending the early evening trying to explain to Koda why I wanted to watch out next President and not Little Einsteins (and failing, and resorting to bribes of all the crackers you can eat...or stomp...whatever), I put the children to bed and watched state by state. After watching many election result nights, you'd think I would know not to panic when McCain was up in some states with a whopping 0.5% of the polls reporting. After spending some initial hours sick to my stomach, remember how I felt this very night in 2000, it started.

It started with Pennsylvania. Being the political geek I am, I knew it was close.

When they called Ohio, I knew it was to be, if not officially.

When, at around 11pm they simultaneously announced our new president-elect, suddenly it was.

And yet, I couldn't believe it. I couldn't believe it as I watched tens of thousands of people erupt in celebration. I couldn't believe it when I saw the tears run down Jesse Jackson's face - only imagining him thinking back to walking next to Martin Luther King Jr and wondering if this day would ever come. I couldn't believe it when I watched an acceptance speech that made me hope for better days ahead and found tears in my own eyes.

Tristen was asleep in the corner of the living room in his pack and play. As the glow of the television slightly shown on his face, listening to my new president talk about what could be, I believed.

I usually end my posts on an uplifting note like the one above. However, as I logged into my Facebook account today and read the postings of people I know, I read one that weighs heavy in my heart. A "friend" from high school wrote "How could any white person vote for Obama..." She noted she was not a racist. Instead of being fired up, instead of alienating her by blasting a posting back, I will do what I think our new president would do. Put my head down, and work. Work to fix this country and do my part. Those that doubt can hypothesize conspiracy theories, can yell what ifs. Some day soon they will look around and say WITH us, as one country, yes we did. Our Country has moved forward as the UNITED states.

Happy Thanks-Christm-oween

Say What?



A few years back my mom got tired of the crazy holiday shuffle. The trudging from one home to another, the competing with others to see who gets the grandkids on Christmas Day, and let's not forget the snow, and sleet, and general Maine yuck in December.



One day she called and said "we are celebrating all holidays on Halloween this year". Odd? Yes. But, it works for our family, and certainly slows the pace of the holiday season just a little bit.



So, the day after Halloween- the Pooh Bear costume still flung over the back seat, we trudged down to my brothers house. We were blessed with a beautiful day so allow an outdoor picnic of al the Thanksgiving fixings, a birthday cake for my brother, pizza (and Christmas eve tradition for us), and holiday gifts for the kids. Koda thinks every time we visit gramma's that it is his birthday. He spent a good twenty minutes in the van singing to himself on the ride down. Heck, let's throw that holiday in too.



Another year so quickly past. My baby cousins are now pre-teens and disney gift certificates have long been replaced with itunes. Whether our holidays are in December or on Halloween, I can't help but think back to the holidays that have already been. The buffets at my aunts, my Grampa offering his walker to a then very young Amanda so she could do flips, a Faith who wouldn't talk tohugh you knew she understood well beyond her age, the smell of pine tree in the living room on Plymouth Drive. The Rudolph ornaments, a Snoopy ornament my brother and I would fight over, and the old Santa tin ornament that was always reserved for mom. It seems like yesterday, really.



This year has been a hard one on my mom's health. I sometimes worry about the Christmas's to come and try to remember to live each moment, create a memory that my children will one day recall. It doesn't much matter that Christmas was on a picnic table. Our family was there, that mattered most.

Halloween on Campus

Living on campus has its perks when you are a three year old. Most notably, college students love you. Tristen is still too young to understand, but not Koda. He basks in the attention. Halloween was a two-day affair. Koda was Pooh Bear, Tristen was Christopher Robin which is mom-speak for "I didn't have a costume for him....so yeah...he can be Christopher Robin".



I have had a tradition for a while now of reverse trick or treating on Halloween. Basically, my staff and I go around knocking on student doors and handing out costume. Of course, we dress up- and look amazing :) the students enjoys it, and this year, Koda did too. He woke up the following morning, ran out to the living room, got this puzzled look on his face and demanded in that way only a three year old can, "Where'd my people go?". I delicately told him his "people" were probably all still sleeping at 7 in the morning, and likely hung over. Thankfully, he doesn't understand the latter. On actual Halloween we went to the Student Union where offices handed out candy. We finfished out the holiday with stall to stall trick or treating at the University horse farm.



Without a doubt, Halloween 2008 will forever be remembered as the "Where'd my people go" holiday. Enjoy our holiday pics.

Stay tuned today...

I know , I know. I'm behind. I'm planning 3 catch-up blog posts today/tonight. They will probably be uploaded tonight since I need to take pictures of my camera. Stay tuned :)

We're getting there!

I was pretty convinced Koda would be going to college in diapers. He just had no interest in the potty. He had had a potty since he turned two. For over a year it collected dust, occasionally used as a seat to watch a show.

We started making a TINY bit of progress about a month and a half ago. I would say maybe 20% of the time he would use the potty, but only if we asked (read that to say bribed).

This week it is just clicking with him. It isn't perfect at all, and he would rather be in a pullup and not think about it, but if we leave him in big boy undies he will go and today he kept going without being asked and without expecting any sort of prize.

Now for pottying in the potty....well, we'll just celebrate the success we've had and have faith that in good time he will master that too.

I can't wait to cross pull ups off my grocery list!!

Seeing Red (Red Dye 40 that is)

A mommy on a message board posted a topic a while ago about red dye 40 and how she found her son acted hyper once he ate something that contained the dye.

Curiously, I started doing some digging. Did you know they don't even allow it in Europe anymore?

Anecdotal evidence (meaning lots of moms) find that by eliminating the dye, behavior dramatically improves. It is thought that some children have a sensitivity to the dye, which can trigger hyperactivity, outbursts, tantrums, dizziness, upset stomach, difficulty in attention span, etc. Some are saying kids are being misdiagnosed with ADHD who may simply be overly sensitive to Red Dye 40.

Upon doing some reading, I thought "well, we'll just stop eating anything with red 40 in it". Do me a favor and look through your pantry sometime. SOOOO much stuff has red 40 in it. In two minutes I found the items in the picture below. Two minutes! What makes me angry are the medications, flinstone vitamins, the pedialyte... heck even pudding? Geesh. And Koda spent pretty much a whole year refusing to eat anything but cereal bars. Any guesses about just what those contain? Red Dye 40? In the verbage of that wise one Sarah Palin... "You betchya!"

Koda is 3, meaning we deal with A LOT of tantrums. I try not to assume that it is food, or this, or that. However, if there is even a chance that it could affect him, on something that isn't even NEEDED in his diet, why on earth would I choose to give it to him? Did you know yellow 5 is derived from coal tar?? Come on! What are these food companies thinking?

I think Travis might be a little slower to join me on my latest granola/tree hugging/natural-wannabe crusade to eliminate this dye from the kids diets, but we are at the very least much more conscious and hopefully moving towards a red dye free lifestyle.

For more information (keep in mind this is all pretty anecdotal right now, but I will take the word of a boat load of mommies anyday over our underfunded, understaffed, and perhaps corrupt FDA !) check out these links:

Probably the best article I found was in Medical News today about a watchdog group asking the FDA to ban Red 40 and other artificial dyes. It gives some good history and a good general overview of the concerns.

This is a VERY general overview

This post talks about one mom's journey in figuring out that red dye 40 was the culprit for her son. Very dedicated!

Dr. Spock's site is a little more neutral on the subject.

A decent piece from the LA Times that talks a little more about Eurpose banning the dyes.

Freaked out by the economy

No cute story today. I'm watching the DOW from my work desktop and can't help but be a little freaked out with all that has happened and continues to happen in the economy.

I don't even care who broke it anymore.

I was watching Saturday Night Live on Thursday last night, and the comic economist had it right on.

"FIX IT...FIX IT....FIX IT!!!!!!!!"

Yes, please.

Voted Early Today!!

*Caution...this post contains political opinion. Continue at your own risk ;) Today is early voting on campus. Early Voting has been going on for a while at the town office, but today the town office came to campus. I sit on a non-partisan committee for the university to try and get out the vote. The town hopes to get 200 people through today. I hope they are successful.

It was really important to me that I bring Koda with me, even though I knew it would be a whole lot more work. Forunately, I don't go to work until 1pm on Thursdays, so after breakfast and a daily dose of Little Einsteins, we bundled up for the walk over to the Union, packed some snacks, toys, and in a momentary act of brialliance, Travis's cellphone that has a Backyardigans episode uploaded to it.

The process itself was really painless. The line was shorter than I expected. We got there about 15 minutes before they opened. Keep in mind I am registered in a ward that is pretty much 99.9% college students. I stood out a little with my double stroller, bottles, cheerios, and a now singing/shrieking cell phone "we're back yard friends...the backyardigans...". For the first time in my voting life, I felt a lump in my throat. I'm an admitted political junky through and through, but for the first time my vote wasn't about me. It was about the drooly kids sitting in the stroller who were currently dropping cookie crumbs all over the hall.

Earlier this morning I was trying to explain to Koda what were going to do today, and why it was important. I interupted his third round of "Kwinkle Kwinkle wittle star" sung/yelled from the top of the slide to tell him today we were voting for the president of the United States.

Koda: Pwesent?
Me: No honey, we are voting for President. Mommy is voting for President and is voting for Obama.
Koda: We go get a Pwesent Obama?

I just laughed and we continued on our morning. A few hour laters I thought how smart my little democrat is. Why yes Koda, today I got to vote for Senator Obama, and that is, in my belief, a huge gift to our country. What a great "pwesent" Obama will be.

Fall in Maine

Fall is my absolute favorite season. I love the crisp mornings, and pulling out the sweatshirts and sweaters for another season. Here are a few shots from a couple weekends ago at Grampy Allen's. Happy Wednesday :)

What I Do For A Living

People are usually beyond shocked when I tell them I still live on campus. The initial panicked look is "dang, it is taking you 12 years to finish your degree?!" Nope. I got my degree in the now atypical four year span back in 1996-2000. I went on to get my Masters in Highed Education. In what? Higher Education. Basically, the study of college students, university settings, leadership, etc. Seriously, it is a degree, and an amazing one at that. After my masters I went on to work at Hiram College in Ohio. Never heard of it you say? That is what makes it great. TINY village, two stoplights, and one convenience store. It was wonderful. We continued to live on campus there while I began my career, a career I continue today.

So what is an average day as a community coordinator? That is what I love. There are no average days. Last night I had meetings with two different students, I ran a staff meeting, and watched the Red Sox. The Red Sox was a legit part of my job. Us New Englanders can get silly at a big win, like with bonfires. (Un)Fortunately, they lost, so with a cuss all my student went to sleep, as did I. Today, I had only one student meeting. I did gobs of administrative paperwork, but ended my day with arts and crafts. I made a whole bunch of banners for upcoming programs with paint markers. I even pretended to be a marketing expert and put my (lacking) computer skills to the test with media design.

What else? Well, tonight I will type up interview questions for a meeting tomorrow. Next week I need to run to the store to buy 25+ pumpkins for the students to carve. On the 30th I will be dressing up like Tigger and handing out candy to the students rooms.

Some days, my job is hard. The day, two years ago, that I had to tell a group of friends their friend was killed by an 11 time drunk driver. Or, the days I need to tell someone that I think they are a remarkable person, but that the choices they are making mean they can't keep being a college student right now. Or the parent, who in all good intentions, intervenes on behalf of their 21 year old and never lets that 21 year old develop their own conflict mediation skills. Or the days that my students are really upset about something, and I just can't make it better.

Foruntately, even on those days there is a program to plan, a banner to paint, or a costume to wear. I can't really tell you what I do for a living, I just hope that I make my students experiences just a little bit better everyday in mostly ways they will never know. Now, where did I put those paint markers...

Money Is Like Coffee, Just Another Sunday

Our family has been attending a church in town since last Spring. Well, maybe not so much in the summer, but we are back in routine.

Travis and I fight over very little. Actually, I can count the number of true arguments we have had. Two. One on our honeymoon about where we were going to eat. It was ridiculous, and attributable to too much sun and very low blood sugar on both our parts. The second was over timeliness. Travis and I will look at the same clock and I will see five minutes until we are late, and he sees 5 minutes to spare. We are just apples and oranges.

So, after rushing out the door this morning, hair still wet, dropping the kids off in the nursery, we just make it in the pew. Or, if you ask Travis, we timed it just right so we were seated just as the opening prayer begun. It takes me about half the service to come down off my timliness gumpiness, right around the time for our minster's sermon. Today it was timely, and a good reminder for us all. The gospel was about money as is mentioned in over 800 places in the bible. Her point, it is just money. It comes, and it goes. As she put it...

"Every morning a man goes to get his coffee and immidiately walks to the bathroom to dump it in the toilet stating "There, I'm not the middle man"." Oddest thing you'll ever hear in church, and yet spot on. It will come and it will go. It is the REST of what is here that matters.

Maybe I will go apologize to Travis for being a bit snappy when we were late this morning. Right in time perhaps for him to comment how great it was that we were there right on time today.

Happy Sunday!

Reading Books With Koda

This week I had a moment most moms can relate to. I walked in to find my three year old Koda had emptied an entire bottle of Elmer's Glue on three carpets. With a proud grin he handed me the now empty bottle. One look at my face and he must have realized it wasn't quite the accomplishment he wanted and he ran to his room to get away.

After prying the glue cap out of my one year olds mouth, I spent the next 40 minutes scrubbing carpets imagining the bill from the univerisity if I didn't get it out. Thinking grumpy thoughts I counted the minutes until Travis got home and let him read the boys their night time story while I walked into our bedroom, crossing a now crunchy carpet, reminding myself that 4 can't be to far way.

The following day Koda asked for me to read to him his goodnight story. He is recently obsessed with a terrible story about a Jester that has lost his Jingle. I find myself skipping sentences, paragraphs, when he doesn't notice even pages, to get through the awful tale. Koda starts out in bed listening to the story. He moves to the edge of the bed. Soon, he scoots off the bed to sit by my side, and before I know it, Koda is leaning against me- head on my shoulder, listening to the twisted tale of the Jester. He reaches out his hand to put on top of mine and when I finish he looks up with a toothpaste dribbled face and says "I wuv you mommy".

With that I've turned the page from the many glue incidents and remind myself that my 3 year old will only be 3 for so long, and soon enough he will think the Jester book is as bad as I do. Next time, I think I'll read the full book while he still lets me.